Repost: midnight poem

I found the glass. 

I broke it. 

I see my blood. 

It's running happily under the starry sky. 

Looking up and took a hook lens; the lullaby is very realm.

It's midnight, where I found; one and white rough paper. 

I was that night, torn it into the pieces. 

I burn it into the red-fire. 

I see the fire dancing following my hollow rhymes. 

I make the damages found their existence. 

I welcome the pain as biggest as the blue ocean. 

I let the wound go deepest on my soul. 

I play the saddest instrumental.

To let my petals fall and keep falling. 

I sing the astronaut song. 

A loneliness kept catching my feeling. 

I wonder. 

"why this pain is feeling so depths?" 

I can't see the blood inside.

But I can feel it hurts me so bad. 

Why? 

Why is this feeling just seems so much dark? 

I wonder yet suffering and somehow; 

I feel the wind. 

the wind of the fantasy to the catastrophic-calling. 

I wonder to guessing the guest. 

So..., as I look up to the sky. 

I saw the 'Sirius' star in there. 

Flashing for his 'Vega', maybe.

I wonder, if..., 

The stars are yet alive? 

 I sing the starry song that night. 

celebrating the loneliness feeling.

yet again and again; 

"Life is going to be harder and just harder."

I sing. 

"twinkle, twinkle little star. 

Can you make this pain go far? 

up above and fly so high, 

Free my path and let me walk.

twinkle, twinkle little star...,"

-Darkest Euphoria.

Dhealoveth in her yesterday nightmare. 

February, 2018

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You know? 

I'm not good. I'm not a religious person. I love to write and shared my writing because I just love to do that. I'm personally not in love with writing in the first place (Don't get me wrong.) 

I just realize that so many ignorant muslim in this world are exist. and I want them to realize that too. And I just want them to understand what this life can turn them to. Of course, I'm doing this because I'm happy.

And of course, though I am a sinner. I'm not feeling good by seeing others doing sin without repent. Also; this is the way how I can be happy. 

that is by..., 'jauhkan diri daripada dosa.' Yup, I may not be the person that is..., close to allah (A saint) but I see myself can slowly avoid from doing the same sin and the biggest one.

So yeah.

There's no mean that I'm good than you and that is also doesn;t mean for you to compared my uncounted sins with your holy body. 

So, To be exact, I'm a sinner. 

I have so many nasty scars in me. Till you couldn't even imagine how disgusting my wounds can be. How deep the pain in me can stabbed me. 

Don't expect any outstanding and amazing things came out from me. Because I'm nothing. 

Okay? 

I'm not the sun nor the light. I am the midnight-blue. But, oh- I am the darkest night. And this darkest is my home. Don't asked me to get out from my own home. 

It's you. Don't ever come any closer. Because in my darkest side of me; there's my monster and demon are hiding all the time. 

They're my bestfriend. 

Well, there's so many more you don' know. 

And yes, of course. 

I am crazy. -Laila.